TW: Child abuse, financial abuse, pregnancy
*This is a little long, so I’ll leave a tldr at the end. I appreciate any help. To make things easy, P1 stands for my good parent, and P2 stands for my awful one who is being divorced.
I’m so stressed, so I’m sorry if this post is a mess.
I found out I’m pregnant a few weeks ago, and I swore to myself I’d never have children because I didn’t want to end up like the moms I’ve had in my life.
Well, we’ve decided to continue with the pregnancy, but I feel like I can’t breathe. I found out the other day (I’m under 26 and still on my P1’s insurance) that the insurance won’t cover any of my maternity care or the cost of labor.
I live in Arizona, but they lowered the income requirements, so I can’t even qualify for ACHHHS state help. (Despite the fact that we barely scrape by as it is??)
Now here comes the hard part…technically, if my P1 cancels their family plan and I get kicked off, I can qualify for a “change in life” enrollment for my works insurance.
BUT, P1 is currently in the midst of divorcing my absolutely horrible and vile P2 who is also on the insurance, which means they would also be kicked off.
If this happens, P2 will undoubtedly use it to fuel their case in an attempt to also get alimony (despite already getting SO MUCH f*cking money – I cannot stress how evil and manipulative P2 is.) My P2 is an expert at painting themselves as the victim, despite being the abuser. I wish I could go into details without giving away too much, because it really is mind boggling all of the stunts that P2 has pulled in an effort to hurt my family and I.
Though they are getting divorced, my P2 is still actively using (and extremely abusing) my P1’s insurance, and the lawyers recommended P1 shouldn’t remove P2 from the insurance because it may make P1 look petty or cruel and could give my P2 ammunition for winning the alimony.
So here I am. No coverage, no maternity care, and I am in tears daily because our child isn’t even here yet and I already can’t take care of then.
I just feel so sick and heart broken and angry. Why is it so hard to get help?
Has anyone else ever been in this situation or something similar? Is there anything I can do?
I feel like such a failure and like deciding to continue with the pregnancy was a mistake. Not because I don’t want them, but because I can’t even provide for them to make sure that they are healthy. I can’t stop crying.
I literally can’t even share the news of my pregnancy anywhere, because if my P2 were to find out, I have no doubt they’d do everything in their power to hurt me or the baby.
My P1 is going to talk to their insurance to see if they can just remove me without canceling the entire plan, but if that isn’t an option…I’m not sure what we can do.
Please…does anyone have advice? I feel so alone.
TLDR; I am pregnant and on one of my parents insurance plans which will not cover maternity care. I live in Arizona and make too much (especially combined with my partner) to qualify for help from ACHHHS state insurance.
Due to a divorce my parents are going through, my parent whose insurance I am on is unable to cancel their insurance so I can get kicked off and qualify for my works insurance.
Do I have any options?
submitted by /u/Sapphira_Rose
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TW: Child abuse, financial abuse, pregnancy *This is a little long, so I’ll leave a tldr at the end. I appreciate any help. To make things easy, P1 stands for my good parent, and P2 stands for my awful one who is being divorced. I’m so stressed, so I’m sorry if this post is a mess. I found out I’m pregnant a few weeks ago, and I swore to myself I’d never have children because I didn’t want to end up like the moms I’ve had in my life. Well, we’ve decided to continue with the pregnancy, but I feel like I can’t breathe. I found out the other day (I’m under 26 and still on my P1’s insurance) that the insurance won’t cover any of my maternity care or the cost of labor. I live in Arizona, but they lowered the income requirements, so I can’t even qualify for ACHHHS state help. (Despite the fact that we barely scrape by as it is??) Now here comes the hard part…technically, if my P1 cancels their family plan and I get kicked off, I can qualify for a “change in life” enrollment for my works insurance. BUT, P1 is currently in the midst of divorcing my absolutely horrible and vile P2 who is also on the insurance, which means they would also be kicked off. If this happens, P2 will undoubtedly use it to fuel their case in an attempt to also get alimony (despite already getting SO MUCH f*cking money – I cannot stress how evil and manipulative P2 is.) My P2 is an expert at painting themselves as the victim, despite being the abuser. I wish I could go into details without giving away too much, because it really is mind boggling all of the stunts that P2 has pulled in an effort to hurt my family and I. Though they are getting divorced, my P2 is still actively using (and extremely abusing) my P1’s insurance, and the lawyers recommended P1 shouldn’t remove P2 from the insurance because it may make P1 look petty or cruel and could give my P2 ammunition for winning the alimony. So here I am. No coverage, no maternity care, and I am in tears daily because our child isn’t even here yet and I already can’t take care of then. I just feel so sick and heart broken and angry. Why is it so hard to get help? Has anyone else ever been in this situation or something similar? Is there anything I can do? I feel like such a failure and like deciding to continue with the pregnancy was a mistake. Not because I don’t want them, but because I can’t even provide for them to make sure that they are healthy. I can’t stop crying. I literally can’t even share the news of my pregnancy anywhere, because if my P2 were to find out, I have no doubt they’d do everything in their power to hurt me or the baby. My P1 is going to talk to their insurance to see if they can just remove me without canceling the entire plan, but if that isn’t an option…I’m not sure what we can do. Please…does anyone have advice? I feel so alone. TLDR; I am pregnant and on one of my parents insurance plans which will not cover maternity care. I live in Arizona and make too much (especially combined with my partner) to qualify for help from ACHHHS state insurance. Due to a divorce my parents are going through, my parent whose insurance I am on is unable to cancel their insurance so I can get kicked off and qualify for my works insurance. Do I have any options?
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